pictures from the past few days

Ok, pics from the past few days in no particular order. I've really managed to stuff myself silly with food these past few days so I think I can enter my confinement period without any regrets! Have done the durian feast, the fancy lamb/sirloin/pork dinner (otherwise known as the meataterian meal) wrapped up with a seriously sinful chocolate cake, the casual but messy and GOOD seafood fest, the fancy dessert binge, the must-have junkfood mac's meals (breakfast hotcakes and filet-o-fish meal...)

Man, I feel sick just reading off that list. Then again, who am I kidding? I could probably do it all over again in an instant. Mmmm.... so yeah, if the baby hasn't gained anything over the past few days of feasting, I'll be flabbergasted.

Ok, enough rambling.. here are the pics.. for more pics of the whole family, check out the sister's blog. Somehow the whole family shots didn't make it onto our camera. duh.

Durian feast at our house - Ted's first taste of the king of fruit
Crazy amount of durian from Raymond's "dealer"
Don't ask, cos I don't know..
Hanging out with Ted
Mom's bday dinner...
Selene, Kale and myself at my IP Law graduation ceremony (the shortest graduation ceremony i've ever been to)
Clearer pic of both of us at the graduation
Us stuffing our face after seafood with orange creme brulee at the fullerton
Crab!!!
Seafood dinner at Jumbo

i hate waiting...

ok, so yeah, i'm impatient.

basically we had an unscheduled appt at the labor ward yest. woke up in the morning, and to spare the gory details, i'll just say i lost my mucous plug early in the morning. baby was a little quiet (i think she's just not a morning person) but after talking to the doc, decided to go down to the hospital to strap in and check the baby's heartbeat. kale made it back from his ride around 11+ and then we proceeded to spend the next 4 hours or so hanging out in the labor ward watching the monitor blip. i apparently had contractions that i didn't know i had.. but they weren't the mind-blowing, serious ones.. hmm.

so after a couple of hours, doc came in and gave me 2 options - go home and wait it out or stay in hospital and wait it out. decided to go home. and going by the fact that i'm still at home.. i think that was a good decision.

so yeah, after being up from 2:45 to 5:30am with a combination of contractions (or at least i think they were) and hunger pangs, i'm tired and grumpy. and the fact that i have no idea how long we're looking at in terms of number of days/hours till actual labor is driving me up the wall. i'm most definitely a control freak. this whole not knowing, not being able to anticipate, not being able to speed it up, etc thing is really not sitting well with me. sigh.

so anyhow, i'm home waiting for labor to start. from what i understand, we were looking at anytime from last nite to the next few days. phew.

guess i'll distract myself by putting pics from the past couple of days up.

noise-cancelling

mr dad, if you're reading this.. kale's really thankful you sent over the noise-cancelling headphones when you did. even though he didn't get a chance to use them on his recent trip on the plane, he forsees a much better use for them - during labour.

he says they'll be perfect to cancel out his noise-making wife. sigh.

and to everyone else reading this who probably thinks my husband is callous and insensitive.. errr, don't take it too seriously.. he was just joking. *i think* i'll let you know if the headphones make it into the maternity bag. hmm.

battle scars

eeps.. it's finally happened!

stretch marks have made their appearance on my belly!! argh. all along i was gloating that my moisturiser was sufficient in keeping my belly stretch-mark free. guess it was not to be.

sigh. they're ugly. wonder how gross they'll look after delivery when i can actually see the underside of my belly? sigh...

nesting...

i think the nesting instinct has kicked in. that's when pregnant women try to get their "nest" in order. the husband insists i've been nesting for a while cos of all the nagging/washing i've been doing.

i must've done 3 loads of baby laundry today alone.. more tomorrow. i'm sorting by color and by size. ie 0-3 mths go in the wash now.. the 3-6mths will go next, and anything beyond will go into another pile for washing at a later date. this baby has clothes sized all the way to 2yrs!! she shall not want, i say!

as an aside, we're also trying to decide if we want to store the cord blood of the baby. there's a promo going on with stemcord now... if we decide to do it, we'll have to go down to the roadshow at suntec tomorrow. hmm.

forgot to blog about this in the previous post but the doc said that we're looking at any time from the first week of august in terms of due date. she won't let it go past the due date... i'm getting nervous cos i just realised that's like the week after next!!! eeks!! better start handing over at work, man!!!

baby update

we went to the doc's yesterday.. and it was a loooooong wait. she had just gotten back from her vacation so everything was kinda backed up. i don't blame her cos i understand it's a once in a blue moon kinda thing, but waiting an hour and a half really is quite torturous. how quickly you forget about the 3-4hr waits in TMC when i used to go there. egads.

anyways, at the start of the 36th week, the baby's 2.7kg and is growing well. =) i've gained quite a bit these past 2 weeks.. am at 58.2kg now.. but that's totally not a surprise cos i've been pigging out every day. i had ben and jerry's 2 days in a row AFTER lunch and then a mac's hot fudge sundae the day after.. eeps.

we got to see the baby again on the ultrasound. by the looks of it, she's going to be a food hound just like her mom!! she was happily sucking down the amniotic fluid and licking the closest membrane during the scan. ok, so it doesn't sound too appetising, but trust me, it was really quite adorable. no good pictures of her this time around tho.

and since we've gone through several weeks without taking any pics.. here's a gratuitous shot of me and my belly at the start of my 36th week. how much bigger can i get???? eeps!

basket case

yup, that's me. totally and utterly emotional. think these pregnancy hormones are kicking in with a vengeance.

i had a minor breakdown in the office this evening because instead of getting shorter, my to-do list keeps on getting longer and longer. bear in mind these are things i HAVE to do before i pop. every meeting i attend ends up leaving me with one more task to do. and i'm sliding further and further behind in the things i have to do. argh. suffice to say there was a lot of groaning, whining, cradling of head in hands and general freaking-out happening at the office this evening.

i then finally make it home... luckily there was some pizza in the fridge so i had that for dinner. and then we plonked on the couch (our usual evening routine). the last episode of season 2 of laguna beach was playing (for the umpteenth time). emotional me watched the over-used shots of the california coastline set to some whiny song (along the lines of coldplay or keane or something) and started bawling. i swear i'm a prime candidate for the hormonal woman loony bin.

the hubby was a little alarmed.. after all, it is only MTV.. and a rerun at that. i couldn't even really explain the tears. all i could think of was that i miss california sooo much. i miss the coast, sitting watching the waves break, the cool wind in my hair, the sun setting, the rugged cliff landscape. but more than the physical coast, i miss what it represents... the care-free life i had in grad school, the feeling of not really having many worries in the world except for what to have for dinner and what homework was due that week. the feeling of living for yourself and not having to think about anyone else really. the self-absorbed years of the early 20s. and i miss that.

granted, i know that i have life good now... my then boyfriend, who, while amazing, was just only my boyfriend and nothing more permanent, is now my husband and a constant in my life. we have stable jobs and while not rich, we have our own place and are definitely not living from hand to mouth. we're looking forward to a new addition to our family. we have families who are always there with unconditional love and support. but the thing is, along with all that comes responsibility. work is stressful - like i said, there's just so much to be done and so little time to do it. each week passes so quickly and my list of things to clear just never shrinks. i'm less productive now which is stressing me out too (yes, over achiever that i am). there are so many more commitments.. and with a baby on the way, along come fears that i may not be able to cope with being someone's mommy.

so while i do appreciate where i am in life, and in many ways am happier now than i have ever been, a part of me longs for the carefree, blissful days when we were in cali. but oh well, i guess we all have to grow up and move on. perhaps some day we'll be able to go back to pescadero beach and sit there and watch the waves break on the cliffs again. but for now, i think we have enough on our plates counting down till the arrival of our l'il one. which is alarmingly soon.. doc's appt tomorrow and hopefully we'll have a better idea when the stork will show up!

gone and done it again...

haha, i'm so predictable!

i saw the link to the great eastern women's run on andrea's page yesterday, and was toying with the idea of doing the 5km fun run. after all, it's on 29th october so i figured i'll be up for it when the time comes. that gives me almost 2 months to rest up and start running.

i called the hubby today since he's still in the US (he's actually on his way back as i type this entry) and asked him if he thought i'd be up for it by the time it came around. 5km may seem like nothing to most of you guys, but to ms couch potato over here, erm, 5km is quite a formidable distance. especially since i really haven't budged in terms of exercise for the past 8 months or so, save 2 swim trips of a couple of laps. hah.

so anyways, the hubby says 5km shouldn't be a problem, and i am foolishly believing him. so i went ahead and registered for it. i was talking to dawn (the best friend) earlier about it and telling her that it would be my wake-up call in october since i'm planning on running the 10km distance in dec for the stanchart run and will DEFINITELY need to train for that. the motivation for that? to hopefully get back into shape post-pregnancy. hopefully the october run will get me off my ass and actually training.

unfortunately, since i'm so predictable, i can sort of tell you how the next few months will go. come the end of september, i'll look at the calendar and go "oops, only a month left, should start running". come a week before the race, i'll probably have gone jogging, hmmm, let's say, optimistically, once or twice. then the race day will come around, i'll berate myself for not training, and still go ahead and do it anyway. yeah. so i don't know how much the whole plan of joining this run to start the training program in preparation is going to work, but one can always hope, right?

watch this space to see if my prediction comes true on my non-training program. haha

*warning* mush ahead..

I have to say that this pregnancy has reinforced one thing - that I'm really lucky. I'm really lucky to be married to my husband, I'm really lucky to have family who's supportive and concerned and make sure I'm never in need of anything (even if sometimes I make fun of how overprotective they are of me.. I know they mean well), I'm really lucky to have colleagues who understand and support me. I've also been really lucky to have had a relatively problem-free pregnancy. Honestly, not counting the morning sickness the first trimester, and up till the last couple of weeks, I've been able to do most of what I'd usually do (within reason).

I can't really even put this into words, but this pregnancy has definitely brought Kale and I closer together. I've never really appreciated him as much as I have these past few months. He's been nothing but supportive the whole time, and when I do take the time to stop and think about it, I realise how lucky I am that God brought him into my life and that we ended up as life partners. I can't imagine going through the experience of pregnancy with anyone else. Sure, we have our ups and downs, there are times I want to throttle the man, but in the grand scheme of things, he's been a pillar of strength and calm the whole way. It sounds so cliched but I've always been able to see him as the father of my children, and I think that's part of why I was so sure he was "the one" for me.

I had a whole chunk of eloquent prose in my head when I started out on this post. I've since lost it.. so I'll put it simply - I am really lucky. And I should learn to count my blessings.

3 more days till the hubby's home!! woo hoo!

belated update on ze baby

This is a little overdue. Went to see the gynae last Thursday. Baby was 2.2kg at the tail end of my 33rd week. I gained only 0.5kg in 2 weeks which I was amazed at (given my previous 2 week track record) and the baby took 0.2-0.3kg of that, which is totally awesome!

Baby's still head down. I asked for some ultrasound pics since the hubby couldn't attend the appt with me. One of the pics is of the kiddo's 2 fists and an upturned foot which I believe was kicking my belly at that very moment the picture was taken. Pretty cute, really!

My grandma and mom were having a good time analysing the face side profiles - saying that the baby's "kok-tao" which translates to "having a high forehead". Both Kale and I definitely have high foreheads and generally large(r) heads so I won't be surprised if this kiddo has a bigger-than-average head! I never crawled cos my head was so heavy I hit it on the ground each time I tried to crawl. Yeah.. I know... I'm weird.

So yeah, that's the latest on the baby. She's still kicking and punching the heck out of my right side. Her elbow/shoulder/hip are grinding against my left side. Oh yah, and she likes upbeat, loud music with a good, strong beat. Never fails to get her moving. Then again, tense meetings at work get her moving too, but I think for a totally different reason!! hah.

pooped.. absolutely pooped

Man, they weren't kidding about the whole "3rd trimester being difficult" thing. This has seriously been the hardest few days/weeks of my pregnancy so far. Ok, maybe that's cos I've forgotten how crappy I felt while suffering through morning sickness in the first trimester. It's amazing how fast you forget these things!

But yes, I'm sore all over, I can't sleep, I'm constantly sleepy, I need to eat, like, ALL THE TIME otherwise I feel weak. Walking is occasionally a challenge (sometimes I'm fine and feel as light as a feather, other days walking 100m seems impossible). And this tiredness? Well, it just doesn't go away. Granted, I'm sure my not being able to sleep throughout the night has something to do with it, but man, I'm really tired ALL THE TIME too. I feel sooo lame. I never wanted to be one of those pregnant women who were all disgruntled and disagreeable. But like I said a while back, I'm slowly losing that battle.

I promise that while this blog is a non-stop whine, I generally refrain from complaining in person... *generally*, with the exception of whining to the hubby. This blog is my outlet, and so unfortunately, you poor readers are subject to my whining.

Anyhow, I'm counting down the weeks... at this point, I'll be more than happy to pop a week or so early, even at 38 weeks!!! Phew...

man, this weekend FLEW by

damn, where did this weekend go??
it's sunday evening already!!
it's partially a good thing since i'd rather the time pass quickly rather than slowly since the hubby's away, but i'm REALLY not looking forward to going to work on monday. like REALLY.

ok gotta go.. grandma and other relatives here.. later!

Something comforting

I've wanted to blog about this for a looong time but I just never got around to it. I bought this book way back in my first trimester - "Prayers for new and expecting moms". I walked into MPH looking for a quick read for the MRT and this book just happened to be on the discount table and caught my eye. It's a compilation of short stories about different moms and moms-to-be, each facing their own challenges and then a short prayer asking for God's guidance and support.

In my first tri, this prayer spoke out to me "At times I feel paralyzed by a growing apprehension that something will go wrong with my baby's development. Lord, only you can see what the coming days will bring. You alone are able to hold this world, my world, securely in its place. Teach me to lay my fears and my fretting down at your feet. Give me the strength and the good sense to leave them there. Let not uncertain happenings spoil these treasured mths of carrying my unborn child. Give me a strong and robust faith, one that will gladly face down the enemies of my soul. Encourage my heart when weariness and doubts begin to plague my mind. Prepare me to be the mother you have designed me to grow into - in your time and through your grace. Amen"

Recently, I've been torn between applying for no-pay-leave for a couple of weeks till the end of the year after my maternity leave ends. It makes sense since we're really only talking about 3 weeks and the disruption of me coming back to work only to take off again for X'mas doesn't really make sense either. But, the over-achiever/workaholic in me can't seem to be fully at ease with taking the no-pay. I worry about the effect it'll have on my career, I worry about ditching my colleagues for that long, etc. I've also spent the past few days going into the office to clear stuff despite being sick, and it's taken its toll on me.

So recently, these couple of lines from the book have spoken to me.. "Will you give me your wisdom, Lord? Help me set proper priorities within my days. Show me what you consider to be most important. Help us decide the best course to follow. Demonstrate to my limited mind what is of true and lasting value. Lord, I am weary from the endless work. I am exhausted in every way conceivable. Still I am not willing to give up. Balance my expectations and make them reasonable and not prone to excessiveness. Let me live each day with a keen awareness of the finiteness of life and an appreciation for all the blessings bestowed upon me. Amen"

So yeah, the book turned out to be a good buy.. one that's brought me comfort. Different stories speak to me at different times.. Sorry about the long entry, but like I said, I've been planning on writing this one for a while...

what a wednesday...

Yesterday, we had our mid-year review which didn't end till pretty late. By that time, I couldn't breathe and my voice was all but gone. So I dragged my sorry arse over to the neighbourhood doc cos the office doc had closed by then. I needed relief, fast! (isn't that some drug tagline?)

By the time I got done with the doc (which ended up a loooong wait cos the doc had gone off for dinner) and picked up dinner, it was pretty late. The doc was a relief doc and prescribed me some antibiotics cos my infection had gotten worse and I needed the antibiotics to kick the bug.

The hubby had finished packing by the time I came back, we caught stage 3 of the TDF and then hit the sack. I woke up at 3am to a scratching noise. At first I thought it was the cats playing with a strap on the floor outside the room so I didn't think much of it and tried to go back to sleep. But the noise kept on recurring so I went to check it out. Turns out Kale had inadvertently closed the door of the bike room on Kito, one of the cats and she was scratching the door in a fury to be let out. It's a good thing I'm a light sleeper.

I had barely lay back down when I began to feel really really weak like I needed food NOW. Figured it was the antibiotics acting up. Got a slice of bread from the kitchen and tried to lay back down again. Barely 20mins later, the alarm rang and the hubby got up to get ready for his flight. I got up, had some yogurt to try and get my tummy to settle down. Said buh-bye to the hubby (i have serious separation anxiety issues) and he took a cab to the airport.

Finally fell back asleep... woke up, visited my old family doc to change my meds since I was pretty sure the antibiotics were the cause of my early morning stomach issues. Turns out some of the other meds I was given weren't kosher for pregnant women. Sigh. So anyhow, I have new meds, and am on MC for the rest of the week. I'm relieved cos I really really am physically fatigued. Need the rest.

So yes, I'm diligently taking my meds and hoping the rest pays off. I need to get better... grrr.

Winning strategy

So, anyhow, I was right. It WAS blardy hot over at ECP. So so hot that you'd wither just standing in the heat. Ugh. Luckily Dawn and I found a cool spot to stand and watch the action. The breeze coming in from the ocean was kinda nice and really quite welcome. Silly me didn't take a picture with Dawn (and her way cool abercrombie shorts, which, ahem ahem, i also happen to have)... but I'm pleading the effects of pregnancy amnesia. hah.

The hubby's team came in first for the open relay.. so I guess their strategy of divide and conquer worked. He managed to link up with a swim coach and a cross-country runner (who's still in JC by the way...) and man, can that boy run! Apparently he did the half-marathon in Dec and came in 4th after 2 African runners. Phew!

It definitely helped that Kale made up 4 mins on the bike and actually his bike split was the fastest out of the top 10 relay riders (thus far, they've only got scores for the top 10). Which is impressive considering they're all within some 10 mins of each other. Phew. He claims he was 2mins faster and that somewhere somehow, transition timing came in.. but oh well, he's still the fastest! So it dun matter! heh.

Our stake-out location wasn't the best to be able to catch photos. It was a good spot to catch all the action since we could see the swimmers running in, the cyclists going by and the runners starting and completing their runs... but picture-wise, pretty dismal. So no really good pictures this time around.

The only picture I have of the whole team - Efren, Kale, Colin (swimmer, biker, runner)
Hans leaving for his bike ride (sorry, Andrea, only pic I managed to get of him!)
Us in the sweltering heat at the transition area
Ah-rub going off on his relay ride
Bad picture of Kale dodging traffic
Another picture of Kale
Blurred picture of Greg riding off for his relay ride

By the way, I totally have a new hero - Victoria Cambell (sp?). I've met her a couple of times at the hubby's bike races in M'sia.. aside from being really pretty (she's hapa, me thinks), she's also one hell of an athlete. She came flying in for the Women's Open category and I knew from watching the race that her timing was really quick cos it took a while for the 2nd woman to come back in. But I just had a look at her timings. She managed to clock a 1:09 bike split (which is approx 10 mins slower than the hubby's) even after swimming 1.5km. And not just that, but she managed the 1.5km swim in 22 mins (the fastest *male* swimmer for the relay came in at 17 mins) !!! Egads. That's incredible. So yeah, man, she's pretty awesome.

So anyhow, the hubby kicked ass (again). Woo hoo! Congrats to team X-Fac! Goodness knows who named the team, but it sounds a little like ex-lac, the laxative.. hmm. The team walked away with the OSIM "i-pamper". Tried it out a little last night. A little odd if you ask me.. too bad there aren't more settings to it cos it's kinda harsh for the uninitiated.

Many thanks go out to Dawn for waking up early (by our standards) to meet me for breakfast and braving the heat with me and to my dad and Selene who also braved the insane 4pm heat to walk over from the insanely far carpark to pick us up. My sis did the walk/trek in her heels, no less, so she definitely deserves mention!

pre-race update

ok, so i'm still sick. but it's sunday, and since kale's already at east coast park getting ready for his first triathlon relay (he's always done the whole damn thing by himself before he figured he should optimise), i figure i should play the devoted wife and go down to see him do his thang.

dawn was nice enough to say she'd meet me for breakfast and hang around with me for the race. so all i need to do now is to throw some clothes on and walk out the door and hail a cab.

dunno how much cheering i'm going to be doing. i've gone and lost my voice. bleah. oh well. at least i now have stronger meds. stronger meds and an MC for tomorrow that i probably won't be able to use cos i have too much stuff to clear before my presentation on tuesday. bleah.

well, enough whining about me. i shall instead, whine about this. WHO ON EARTH DECIDES TO START A RACE AT 12:10PM IN SINGAPORE??? Kale's wave starts at 12:10pm. which means that by the time he even gets on the bike, it'll be about 1-ish. GRRR. Can you say blardy hot?

Will update more later.. off to ECP I go...