psychoanalysis

I met my former belly dance teacher, Fiona for lunch today. I say former not because I have another teacher now, but more because she's become more of a friend than a teacher to me. She's very close to my age, and somehow, we just clicked. So despite having only known her for 2 years or so, I'd count her as one of my closer friends. We got married within 2 weeks of each other, so we've sorta been able to share experiences too...

She stopped teaching and moved to London with her husband who's teaching at a uni over there. She's now studying dance therapy and is also taking counselling classes. She has the perfect disposition to do such a thing, she has the nurturing type of personality that makes you want to open up to her. I mentioned this to her over lunch, and she says that she agrees that she's lucky to enjoy a level of intimacy with people she knows and talks to. I mulled that over for a bit and replied that I thought "comfort" would be a better word to use than "intimacy" - meaning that people feel comfortable in talking to her and opening up to her.

She then said the most interesting thing (well, to me at least). She said that that sentence spoke volumes about me. That I would choose "comfort" over "intimacy". She said that it shows that I'm a guarded person. Oddly enough, I don't think I've ever used the word "guarded" on myself, and I don't think I would ever come to that conclusion about myself. I said that I yak far too easily and I think I wear my emotions on my sleeve and hence I don't think I'm guarded. She replied that perhaps talking alot was my way of disarming/distracting the people I speak to.

I was just thinking about what she said. I think there's quite a bit of truth in it, come to think of it. I DO talk a lot, and at face value, I DO share quite a bit with people.. come on, I mean, I have a blog for the world to see! And people tend to know how I'm feeling. But, you know what? She's not the first person to say that about me. Kale mentioned a looong time ago when we first started dating that he thought I was an "extroverted introvert". Meaning that on the outside, I'm an extrovert... but deep down inside I'm an introvert. That too was something new to me.

Funny how it takes someone else to point this out. Guess the education Fiona's receiving is pretty darn good and she's on her way to being an awesome therapist! =)

But enough of a whole post dedicated to my personality.. promise that'll be the last self-absorbed post for a while (who am i kidding??) It was great meeting up with her again... I'm kinda bummed she's so far away.. =( I haven't danced since she left, really, and I miss having her around to talk to.. but oh well, I guess everyone has their path in life, and her's is with her hubby in London.

Ok lah, time for shower...